Without a doubt, last night capped the end of a very strange year for me.
There was so much pain and sadness in my life over the last 12 months.
There was also quite a bit of happiness too.
I learned some of the harshest lessons of my life, including our time with loved ones grows shorter every second and trusting the people around you needs to come through time, not because they get to work at the same time as you.
This past year showed the true colors of some people in good and bad ways. For the bad, I found out very quickly who truly was on my side. For the good, finding that out made things go much smoother.
People aren’t always going to like you. I learned there are people (specifically women) who straight out hate/fear anyone who might make them the slightest bit insecure. The women who make ME insecure….tend to be my friends because I want to learn from them!
This year presented great change for me, personally and professionally. I started paying more attention to my physical and mental well-being.
In August, I got a wake-up call, a termination for no reason, and an escort out of a building I was welcomed to twice prior over the last six years.
Was I truly happy doing radio? Turns out, I’d grown past what I had been doing.
I’d grown out of needing a baby-sitter to tell me what to do and how to pick/choose what to report. After more than seven years in Indianapolis, I think my judgement is more than sound. Turns out, others think so too.
This year, I discovered my own self-sufficience. I had no choice. I discovered I’m actually decent at public relations and marketing. I discovered people do actually like and respect me. I realized if one person hates you, it doesn’t mean the rest of the world agrees.
I discovered love. Shocking, I know. It still frightens and shocks me each day, but in the best way possible. After multiple failures and more abuse than I care to write about again or relive, I agreed to a fix-up by a new friend.
Turns out, he’s the love of my life. Through the toughest period of my life, he stayed by my side. He held me while I cried my heart out, he held my hand when news about my father was both good and bad, and he gave me a promise ring that keeps him close to me whereever I go.
I started pursuing hobbies I loved, like fashion and working out.
I started eliminating drama.
It felt good.
I now enjoy staying home by the fire, drinking hot cider and reading a book. I am about to live with dogs for the first time in my life.
The questions linger as this new year dawns: will I ever go back to radio? Will I ever put skates back on? Will I find the right match in the job world? Will I finally get the challenge I seek?
Truth is, I don’t have the answers now any more than I might have 24 hours ago.
But, I do know this: when you have love in your life (whether it be friends, family, a significant other, etc) you cannot go wrong.
Remember, it’s a two-way street: you have to give out what you want back.